Today at my appointment we found 2 more follicles. We’re at a total of 11 so far (4 on the right, 7 on the left). They measure between 11-15 mm. I received a call with my blood work results around 12:30. My estrogen levels went up again but not as drastically as the day before. My progesterone levels have also increased. It’s currently at 1.3 and my nurse wanted to give me a ‘heads up’ that if it hits 1.6 we’ll need to switch to a freeze all cycle. That means we would still do retrieval as planned but then all of our fertilized embryos would be frozen for use next month. It’s devastating news. I wanted to keep moving forward. I’m on a daily plan which means I will be going to the doctors every morning before work until whenever retrieval happens. There’s no telling whether my progesterone level will continue to increase or if it could remain steady. I’m praying it stops increasing. We don’t want this pushed back another month. We’re participating in a study which is covering the cost of our ICSI/PGD and I believe it is only for a fresh cycle, meaning that $7000 would no longer be covered if we do a freeze all cycle. In addition, there are fees associated with thawing and whatnot. And then there’s the obvious, another month without a baby.
I was really low today after that phone call. I question whether this is going to work for us. I question why my body can’t just do what it was made to do. Why does this have to be such a challenge for me? I’ve had one dream in my life that has lasted more than 20 minutes, and that’s to be a mom. It’s the only thing I haven’t quit trying for. At least not yet. I cried, I prayed and I wished we could just be able to move forward. I’m bracing myself for heartbreak but hoping for the best.